[things have, without any shadow of a doubt, been difficult.
from the moment they had gotten word that the eye of god had been stolen once more, it's been a downhill spiral of painful, difficult situations. leon's betrayal, the reveal of his family ties, his sacrifice; the way they've had to take out the oberon managers one by one.
sure, they'd managed to save marian, but what else did they have? a largely hopeless looking situation. a situation where no matter how much he's hurting, stahn has to raise his head. there was no time to grieve, and any time he let the cracks show, someone was telling him to suck it up. he had to fulfill his duty as swordian master, they were counting on him, he was leading them.
(though he's not even sure when he became the leader, barring the fact that leon had left the task in his hands and trusted him.)
but one thing right after the other is draining. stahn hasn't had time to grieve, to mourn, to recover. he's bottling everything up, because nobody will let him be himself. he's a sheltered boy from the countryside, one who has never seen true pain and hardship before this. one who has never lost loved ones or been responsible for other people dying.
it's a weight on his shoulders that feels crushing. there's no sun in the sky—night is eternal after belcrant's firings. and while they still have stops to make to retrieve the lens they need to break through the shell and reach dycroft, the first order of business is to rest up in darilsheid's inn.
once the conversation of a plan is squared away, that's when stahn decides to slip away, exiting the inn's tavern and heading towards the cape where he and rutee had spoke before their previous journey's end. he just needs air, and some time to think—without dymlos nagging him, for once.]
spill;
from the moment they had gotten word that the eye of god had been stolen once more, it's been a downhill spiral of painful, difficult situations. leon's betrayal, the reveal of his family ties, his sacrifice; the way they've had to take out the oberon managers one by one.
sure, they'd managed to save marian, but what else did they have? a largely hopeless looking situation. a situation where no matter how much he's hurting, stahn has to raise his head. there was no time to grieve, and any time he let the cracks show, someone was telling him to suck it up. he had to fulfill his duty as swordian master, they were counting on him, he was leading them.
(though he's not even sure when he became the leader, barring the fact that leon had left the task in his hands and trusted him.)
but one thing right after the other is draining. stahn hasn't had time to grieve, to mourn, to recover. he's bottling everything up, because nobody will let him be himself. he's a sheltered boy from the countryside, one who has never seen true pain and hardship before this. one who has never lost loved ones or been responsible for other people dying.
it's a weight on his shoulders that feels crushing. there's no sun in the sky—night is eternal after belcrant's firings. and while they still have stops to make to retrieve the lens they need to break through the shell and reach dycroft, the first order of business is to rest up in darilsheid's inn.
once the conversation of a plan is squared away, that's when stahn decides to slip away, exiting the inn's tavern and heading towards the cape where he and rutee had spoke before their previous journey's end. he just needs air, and some time to think—without dymlos nagging him, for once.]