Because I wasn't just the king. I was the True King. My job... was to save the world. Bring light back and end the Starscourge.
[you know, just a plague on their world, destroying it to the point that the sun stopped rising and humanity was falling to daemons.]
The Crystal... is the soul of Eos. And to use it's power to bring back light, I needed to wait until the ring passed down through my family—that had the power of my forebears—was strong enough. And I needed to be strong enough to wield it.
[rude's definitely an understatement.]
It took ten years for that to happen. Ten years... where everyone lived in darkness and had to fight to stay alive. [he couldn't protect them at all in that time, and even dear friends of his had been lost because of that.
but... it was a sacrifice he had to make for the greater good.]
[his situation was a lot worse than she had thought. a lot worse than he had hinted in his letters. it's no wonder he looks even more exhausted than he did at the end of that mutual killing game they were forced to take part in so long ago]
[she reaches out to ghost her fingers against his cheek. a cheek rough with the stubble of his beard; it's different, but she finds she likes it.]
. . . you've been walking a difficult path.
[one chosen for him, not by him. no wonder he emphasized how important it was for him to decide what would happen to him after death]
And did you succeed in bringing back that light, as the True King of Eos?
[so much of that he hadn't learned until it was too late to tell her—and of course, that's why he couldn't until now.
he leans so easily into milla's touch; even though it's light—it's warm, it's comforting in a way he hasn't experienced in a long while. and to that, he nods.]
I think so. To fulfill that prophecy means... to give my life. To end the line of Lucis. I did my part—I can only hope my friends got to see the sun rise when it was all over.
[he can never truly know for certain, but he knows he did everything that he was suppoed to; if what bahamut told him was true in that guidance, then the world should be safe.]
No more Lucian kings, no more Oracles. No more endless nights, the Starscourge, and no more daemons. No more Crystal to war over. That—that was my role as king.
[and he gave his life to ensure his world would be safe from what plagued it for thousands of years. eos, and all the life it still held, would be able to rebuild anew from his sacrifice, and that includes his precious best friends.
...he's tired, but he's satisfied. to die twice for the greater good of people he cares for, he's okay with that.]
It's finally over. And... I'm free. [it's still bittersweet, but it's very obvious that it was a role noctis accepted and came to terms with over the last ten years.]
[her hand hovers by his cheek, and she makes sure she watches his expression carefully as he speaks]
It seems unfair, for your fate to require you to die in order to save the lives of your people.
[he knows her own situation. knows that she was created for a specific purpose that she bucked against until she could fulfill her own desires. but she also knows what it's like to be in his position. to know that your death will protect those you love so much]
But. . . as long as you can say you're proud of your choices. . .
It... was a fate I couldn't fight. A prophecy that I was meant to fulfill. It may not be fair, but...
[even though it's tired and a bit melancholic, he smiles.]
It's not something I regret. Too many lives were lost because I wasn't there, but too many more would've been if I didn't do that. I... can hardly imagine it myself, the world falling apart because the sun wouldn't rise. Living that way for ten years.
I was able to end that for my people, for my whole world.
[so... he's definitely proud of his choices.]
I almost wrote you to tell you all of it when I woke up. But... I thought it would be easier. To tell you this way.
[since he'd already known by the time he was on his feet again that he'd be giving up his life in only a couple of days' time.]
[that much was obvious, but somehow, his words make her marvel at this fact. he has grown so much, even if he spent the majority of the past ten years asleep]
But even so, you're still a do-gooder until the very end. Aren't you?
[but deep down, he's still Noctis. and that's what she likes the most about him. the fondness is evident in her words, and in the way she smiles up at him, slightly teasing]
[it's true; there's little getting around the fact that ten years has given him time. even if he was asleep to the world, he still had a sense of awareness and plenty of time to work out a lot of his problems.
so many of them had come from not being ready for the responsibilities that he faced. learning that they were even greater than he'd once realized forced him to step up to the plate quite a bit.]
Yeah. Guess I am, but if that means that they all have a chance to live, then... it's a good thing.
[hasn't he always just wanted to protect people's lives? to help other people, it was like that even ten years ago.]
I knew I had something to look forward to after that. Ending my life there wasn't the end.
[she's so glad that part of him never changed. she drops her hand from his cheek so she can thread her fingers with his. even the smallest bit of contact with him is electrifying, honestly]
May I say "welcome home" now?
[it isn't completely accurate, considering this was never his home before. but she said she'd reserve those words for when he finally returned to the Crown City, and she never got to say them. so. . . now is as good of a time as any, right?]
[he nods his head, giving milla's hand a gentle squeeze. he's definitely not about to let go, either.]
...I'm home. For real, now.
[and he ays it with a smile, because he's looking at it differently than milla. his life on eos is over; he's done all he needed to in the crown city. now... this is his home.
it's where he'll be for his afterlife. his new life? whatever it may be, having been reincarnated into a spirit.]
Yeah. Gonna need to know a lot if this my new life. I'm... counting on you.
[to show him and tell him all about it. he's obviously willing to follow wherever it is she wants to go. milla has the lead on this one, considering he really knows next to nothing about rieze maxia or elympios.
and he wants to know what all that with the four was, too. considering... everything they were saying was super confusing?]
[. . . normally she'd just fly from place to place with Sylph's power, but since she dismissed the Four earlier, she doesn't have the ability to do that right now. which is okay! Nia Khera (the spirit realm version) isn't far. and it'll be nice to walk along the beach hand-in-hand with him until they get there, anyway]
Let me start with the cycle of reincarnation.
When a human dies, their soul is gathered up by Origin, the Great Spirit of the Void. It's his task to purify the soul of its impurities so it can be reborn into the spirit world as a lesser spirit. The process of purifying the soul essentially wipes it clean of its memories and sense of self, and it becomes a blank slate.
The fact that you've retained your sense of self defies this cycle. That's why the Four were confused by your presence.
[it's definitely at least, good scenery, even if entirely unfamiliar. it gives him a chance to look at it all as they walk—between stolen glances at milla as she explains it.]
I broke the natural order of things by being here. Makes plenty of sense why they'd be confused by it.
[though it raises a bit of a question, one noct is sure must be important.]
Is... that gonna mess anything up? For you, or for this world?
[the beautiful Kijara Seafalls!! which is inhabited by quite a few monsters, but now that Milla is around they seem to be keeping their distance. perhaps they know better than to pick a fight with the Lord of Spirits]
Not at all. You may be an anomaly, but your mere existence won't keep the cycle from continuing.
[pppppause]
You're also not the first one in this world to be reincarnated outside of that cycle.
[definitely a nifty trick, though noct isn't going to complain if they don't have to fight right now. he's tired, he's had enough of that for now.]
...Gonna guess that you were like that too. [she died once, after all—in this world. so the fact she still has those memories would make her an anomaly too, wouldn't it?]
[she's silent for a moment as she lifts her free hand and places it over her heart. there's something distracted about her expression as she recounts these memories.]
. . . I did, yes.
Perhaps my memories and my sense of self were gone, but my heart. . . that remained. I remembered things as I traveled across the spirit realm and saw familiar landmarks of places I had visited in the realm of man. When I slept, I dreamed of Jude. I remembered meeting him. I remembered traveling with him. I remembered. . . how much I wanted to be the Maxwell he adored.
[her hand clenches into a fist]
With the help of the Four, I received an ancient arte from one of my predecessor's specters-- concentrated forms of his consciousness that he could send out to various parts of the world in order to carry out the cycle of purification and reincarnation. Origin purifies the souls of the departed now, but back then, before the Schism was destroyed, my predecessor used those shadows to monitor the process himself.
With this arte in hand, I climbed to the top of the Nia Khera Hallowmont, which was the only entrance to the Temporal Crossroads-- the door between the realms of spirit and man-- from the spirit world. From there, I saw my comrades. . . I saw Jude. . . engaged in battle with my predecessor.
Seeing his determination, his unwavering will, and his desire to keep fighting. . .
[a deep breath]
That, in tandem with the ancient arte, brought back to me my memories and everything that made me. . . Milla.
[notably she is just using "Milla," not "Milla Maxwell." because back then, she wasn't Maxwell, was she? not officially, anyway. she was Milla, the woman who made herself Maxwell through sheer determination and heart]
[he's quiet as she speaks, listening thoughtfully to her words and her story.
some of it goes over his head a bit—locations and artes, and other things that he can only recall from the stories she told him a decade earlier. but he still follows the general idea of what she's saying.
and hough there's something strange and melancholic about it, noctis finds a faint smile on his lips.]
...Sounds like you. Even losing everything about yourself, you kept going forward until you found a way to get it back.
[it's something she credits jude for, and noctis won't deny that he was probably part of it; he knows well enough already that jude is someone important to her, someone who has motivated her to be better and stronger, and hearing this story...
well, he definitely understands it a little more than when she'd first explained it to him.]
Bet even without that, you probably would've found a way to keep going until you were you again.
[but. noct is glad for it, because... he's glad the milla he met is someone strong enough to face that and conquer it. it's what made him like her to begin with and help motivate him so much to live up to the title that had been decided for him.]
[she's sorry she can't tell this story without confusing him with location and arte names oops]
I would have tried.
[and she tilts her head towards him now]
But I suppose that memory stands out to me as an example of the profound effect people can have on each other, even in such short periods of time. Of course. . . it's only one of many.
[well, at least it wasn't all that tough to tell which one of those spirits was muzét, for whatever that may be worth.
and definitely the one he was most unsure of, because for all that noctis has grown... he's still noctis. that's enough to fluster him at least a little when she gets like that.]
She... seemed like it. But I think that's just what sisters do. Or siblings in general. [coming from his... experience of dealing with people who have sisters.]
I'm sure... you'll fill them all in just fine, anyway. [please make sure muzét doesn't flirt with him too much, he is not ready for this life.]
[she can't help but chuckle, as though she's sensing his embarrassment. SHE REALLY DOES LIKE HIS EMBARRASSED FACES I'm sorry Noctis, she finds them endearing. . .]
I suppose it is. The only experience I have with sisters are with Muzét and Yuna, and they're both very different from each other.
[one was tiny and spunky and cute and determined, and the other was A MENACE]
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no subject
That's very rude of it.
[rude is such an understatement??]
But that would explain your ten year silence. Why did you need to rest inside the crystal to get stronger?
no subject
[you know, just a plague on their world, destroying it to the point that the sun stopped rising and humanity was falling to daemons.]
The Crystal... is the soul of Eos. And to use it's power to bring back light, I needed to wait until the ring passed down through my family—that had the power of my forebears—was strong enough. And I needed to be strong enough to wield it.
[rude's definitely an understatement.]
It took ten years for that to happen. Ten years... where everyone lived in darkness and had to fight to stay alive. [he couldn't protect them at all in that time, and even dear friends of his had been lost because of that.
but... it was a sacrifice he had to make for the greater good.]
no subject
[his situation was a lot worse than she had thought. a lot worse than he had hinted in his letters. it's no wonder he looks even more exhausted than he did at the end of that mutual killing game they were forced to take part in so long ago]
[she reaches out to ghost her fingers against his cheek. a cheek rough with the stubble of his beard; it's different, but she finds she likes it.]
. . . you've been walking a difficult path.
[one chosen for him, not by him. no wonder he emphasized how important it was for him to decide what would happen to him after death]
And did you succeed in bringing back that light, as the True King of Eos?
no subject
he leans so easily into milla's touch; even though it's light—it's warm, it's comforting in a way he hasn't experienced in a long while. and to that, he nods.]
I think so. To fulfill that prophecy means... to give my life. To end the line of Lucis. I did my part—I can only hope my friends got to see the sun rise when it was all over.
[he can never truly know for certain, but he knows he did everything that he was suppoed to; if what bahamut told him was true in that guidance, then the world should be safe.]
No more Lucian kings, no more Oracles. No more endless nights, the Starscourge, and no more daemons. No more Crystal to war over. That—that was my role as king.
[and he gave his life to ensure his world would be safe from what plagued it for thousands of years. eos, and all the life it still held, would be able to rebuild anew from his sacrifice, and that includes his precious best friends.
...he's tired, but he's satisfied. to die twice for the greater good of people he cares for, he's okay with that.]
It's finally over. And... I'm free. [it's still bittersweet, but it's very obvious that it was a role noctis accepted and came to terms with over the last ten years.]
no subject
It seems unfair, for your fate to require you to die in order to save the lives of your people.
[he knows her own situation. knows that she was created for a specific purpose that she bucked against until she could fulfill her own desires. but she also knows what it's like to be in his position. to know that your death will protect those you love so much]
But. . . as long as you can say you're proud of your choices. . .
Then I'd like to say that I'm proud of you, too.
no subject
[even though it's tired and a bit melancholic, he smiles.]
It's not something I regret. Too many lives were lost because I wasn't there, but too many more would've been if I didn't do that. I... can hardly imagine it myself, the world falling apart because the sun wouldn't rise. Living that way for ten years.
I was able to end that for my people, for my whole world.
[so... he's definitely proud of his choices.]
I almost wrote you to tell you all of it when I woke up. But... I thought it would be easier. To tell you this way.
[since he'd already known by the time he was on his feet again that he'd be giving up his life in only a couple of days' time.]
no subject
[that much was obvious, but somehow, his words make her marvel at this fact. he has grown so much, even if he spent the majority of the past ten years asleep]
But even so, you're still a do-gooder until the very end. Aren't you?
[but deep down, he's still Noctis. and that's what she likes the most about him. the fondness is evident in her words, and in the way she smiles up at him, slightly teasing]
no subject
so many of them had come from not being ready for the responsibilities that he faced. learning that they were even greater than he'd once realized forced him to step up to the plate quite a bit.]
Yeah. Guess I am, but if that means that they all have a chance to live, then... it's a good thing.
[hasn't he always just wanted to protect people's lives? to help other people, it was like that even ten years ago.]
I knew I had something to look forward to after that. Ending my life there wasn't the end.
[after all, he's here now.]
no subject
[she's so glad that part of him never changed. she drops her hand from his cheek so she can thread her fingers with his. even the smallest bit of contact with him is electrifying, honestly]
May I say "welcome home" now?
[it isn't completely accurate, considering this was never his home before. but she said she'd reserve those words for when he finally returned to the Crown City, and she never got to say them. so. . . now is as good of a time as any, right?]
no subject
...I'm home. For real, now.
[and he ays it with a smile, because he's looking at it differently than milla. his life on eos is over; he's done all he needed to in the crown city. now... this is his home.
it's where he'll be for his afterlife. his new life? whatever it may be, having been reincarnated into a spirit.]
no subject
You have much to learn about Rieze Maxia and Elympios, as well as your new life as a spirit. Allow me to give you a tour!
Ah, and then I'll explain to you why your presence here confused the Four so much.
no subject
[to show him and tell him all about it. he's obviously willing to follow wherever it is she wants to go. milla has the lead on this one, considering he really knows next to nothing about rieze maxia or elympios.
and he wants to know what all that with the four was, too. considering... everything they were saying was super confusing?]
no subject
Let me start with the cycle of reincarnation.
When a human dies, their soul is gathered up by Origin, the Great Spirit of the Void. It's his task to purify the soul of its impurities so it can be reborn into the spirit world as a lesser spirit. The process of purifying the soul essentially wipes it clean of its memories and sense of self, and it becomes a blank slate.
The fact that you've retained your sense of self defies this cycle. That's why the Four were confused by your presence.
no subject
I broke the natural order of things by being here. Makes plenty of sense why they'd be confused by it.
[though it raises a bit of a question, one noct is sure must be important.]
Is... that gonna mess anything up? For you, or for this world?
no subject
Not at all. You may be an anomaly, but your mere existence won't keep the cycle from continuing.
[pppppause]
You're also not the first one in this world to be reincarnated outside of that cycle.
no subject
...Gonna guess that you were like that too. [she died once, after all—in this world. so the fact she still has those memories would make her an anomaly too, wouldn't it?]
no subject
[she says that evenly, like the fact that she. you know. died doesn't bother her]
When I first passed, the Four managed to retrieve my soul from the River of Souls before it could be purified. But. . .
[she shakes her head]
They were unable to retrieve me as I was. I lost. . . my memories. My name. My sense of self.
no subject
[well, he knows she did. That's obvious enough, because milla is milla—but she also very obviously is herself and has all of those memories.
there's obviously a story here that she hasn't yet told him—and of course, noct wants to know it all.]
no subject
. . . I did, yes.
Perhaps my memories and my sense of self were gone, but my heart. . . that remained. I remembered things as I traveled across the spirit realm and saw familiar landmarks of places I had visited in the realm of man. When I slept, I dreamed of Jude. I remembered meeting him. I remembered traveling with him. I remembered. . . how much I wanted to be the Maxwell he adored.
[her hand clenches into a fist]
With the help of the Four, I received an ancient arte from one of my predecessor's specters-- concentrated forms of his consciousness that he could send out to various parts of the world in order to carry out the cycle of purification and reincarnation. Origin purifies the souls of the departed now, but back then, before the Schism was destroyed, my predecessor used those shadows to monitor the process himself.
With this arte in hand, I climbed to the top of the Nia Khera Hallowmont, which was the only entrance to the Temporal Crossroads-- the door between the realms of spirit and man-- from the spirit world. From there, I saw my comrades. . . I saw Jude. . . engaged in battle with my predecessor.
Seeing his determination, his unwavering will, and his desire to keep fighting. . .
[a deep breath]
That, in tandem with the ancient arte, brought back to me my memories and everything that made me. . . Milla.
[notably she is just using "Milla," not "Milla Maxwell." because back then, she wasn't Maxwell, was she? not officially, anyway. she was Milla, the woman who made herself Maxwell through sheer determination and heart]
no subject
some of it goes over his head a bit—locations and artes, and other things that he can only recall from the stories she told him a decade earlier. but he still follows the general idea of what she's saying.
and hough there's something strange and melancholic about it, noctis finds a faint smile on his lips.]
...Sounds like you. Even losing everything about yourself, you kept going forward until you found a way to get it back.
[it's something she credits jude for, and noctis won't deny that he was probably part of it; he knows well enough already that jude is someone important to her, someone who has motivated her to be better and stronger, and hearing this story...
well, he definitely understands it a little more than when she'd first explained it to him.]
Bet even without that, you probably would've found a way to keep going until you were you again.
[but. noct is glad for it, because... he's glad the milla he met is someone strong enough to face that and conquer it. it's what made him like her to begin with and help motivate him so much to live up to the title that had been decided for him.]
no subject
I would have tried.
[and she tilts her head towards him now]
But I suppose that memory stands out to me as an example of the profound effect people can have on each other, even in such short periods of time. Of course. . . it's only one of many.
no subject
Yeah. I guess... that's how people are a lot.
[he looks to her with a small smile. sounds familiar?]
...Probably wouldn't be here now if it wasn't for that, you know.
no subject
I'll explain to the Four and Muzét why your circumstances are special. I think they'll take a liking to you rather quickly.
Please excuse my sister, though. She has a very unique personality.
[Milla is fond of Muzét but BOY is Muzét a trip and a half. also there's that history of Muzét trying to kill her a couple of times so you know]
no subject
and definitely the one he was most unsure of, because for all that noctis has grown... he's still noctis. that's enough to fluster him at least a little when she gets like that.]
She... seemed like it. But I think that's just what sisters do. Or siblings in general. [coming from his... experience of dealing with people who have sisters.]
I'm sure... you'll fill them all in just fine, anyway. [please make sure muzét doesn't flirt with him too much, he is not ready for this life.]
no subject
I suppose it is. The only experience I have with sisters are with Muzét and Yuna, and they're both very different from each other.
[one was tiny and spunky and cute and determined, and the other was A MENACE]
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