004 ☀ Tytree Crowe/Cardia Beckford

[petnadjanka]

Comments

[petnadjanka]

As long as you're not gonna just take off runnin', then yeah.

[he's wary. she's acting like a flight risk right now and it kind of frightens tytree a little.]

[discardia]

You would... probably catch me, even if I tried.

[ Let's be honest, here. Cardia may have an astonishing amount of stamina for a girl her size, but Tytree's not exactly slow. ]

... I won't run.

[petnadjanka]

Okay.

[he's going to trust her on this one, so he'll finally let go properly and give cardia some space. he's still pretty upset and displeased with this situation, but she deserves a chance to explain herself.

he can try to figure it out from there, so tytree will just let her lead the way to wherever it is she wants to go to talk about this.]

[discardia]

[ She'll at least pause to pick up her hat first, dusting it off before settling it back on her head and heading off. They're near the edge of a forest, and Cardia picks her way carefully through the trees until she finally stops and turns to face him. ]

I'm not... who you think I am.

[petnadjanka]

[he'll stop when she does... but that's not a very compelling opening argument. specifically because—well, tytree doesn't get it.]

Huh? Who are you, then?

[discardia]

... I don't know. [ Not anymore, although she has to wonder if she ever really knew who she was. ]

But I'm... not even human. I'm an artificial creation... the one successful attempt out of six hundred and sixty-six, in order to create and sustain an incredibly powerful stone.

[ She says this tonelessly, because if she lingers on any one part of it, she won't be able to continue. ]

I'm just a doll. And I don't hold any more importance to the others. There's no reason to involve them in anything else.

[petnadjanka]

[tytree doesn't like this—he doesn't like it at all. to him, it sounds like she's just making excuses to run away. cardia is making choices on her own, deciding things that he's sure nobody else thinks.

which is why his expression hardens so quickly. he can't accept her logic, even if some of what she's saying doesn't make much sense to him.]

I've said it before, haven't I? It doesn't matter what you are—you can't decide that you're not important to people! You're you—that's enough.

[it's probably not enough to say, but you know. sometimes tytree just needs a minute to get the stream of consciousness going.]

I don't know what most of that stuff means but... if you're here and you're feelin', then it makes you important. Even if someone created you, isn't it more special that you're here? How you got here doesn't matter. You're here, you're alive, you can feel and talk and live... you're important!

[his words are getting a bit jumbled because he's having a hard time wrapping his head around some of it...

but tytree's gonna tytree. he doesn't care what she is. cardia is cardia, she's a person like the rest of them even if it's not some kind of normal way of coming to exist. or whatever.]

[discardia]

It's not that simple!

[ She wants it to be simple, more than anything, but as her voice cracks a bit and she shakes her head-- she can't wrap her mind around it. Her hands have balled into fists now, for as much as she fights to calm down. ]

I was never supposed to-- do any of that! I was just supposed to wait and be-- completed, and not feel or care or hurt anybody--

I don't know what to do anymore! I don't know where I'm supposed to go from here!

[ She's lost, plain and simple. Lost and scared, but the last thing she wants to do is hurt anybody else. ]

[petnadjanka]

Why does what was supposed to happen matter? What happened already happened—ya can't just ignore it and go runnin' away! That doesn't fix things at all!

[he can see that she's lost and scared—even tytree can't miss that. he's yelling, but it still hurts him to see her like this. hadn't he already told her more than once than she wasn't a monster? she was a person, no matter what she believed.

and even if there are things he doesn't understand about what she is specifically, how she was brought into this world or why—tytree doesn't think this is right. she shouldn't have to run, she should have to be alone.

that's stupid. if this had been veigue, he would have thrown punches to make a point. but this is cardia, and with her—it's definitely different.

so instead he reaches forward, enveloping her in a hug; his grip is tight, because he doesn't want her to just push him away right now.]

Let us help you! Don't run away... don't you know how selfish it is to do that without thinkin' about how the rest of us feel!?

[discardia]

[ She'd considered herself a monster, but she'd always wanted to believe-- even if she wasn't normal, even if she had memories from only a short time ago, there was a reason. Her father had placed the Horologium inside of her to save her, she was still a human, she was still--

But all of that had been badly shaken and it's hard for Cardia to explain just how it feels. There's a sharp, shaky gasp when he pulls her against him, a little too disconcerted to even consider struggling-- but no one's ever hugged her like this, except for Lupin pulling her in to kidnap her/help her escape from the train. And this... this feels different.

A part of her wants to protest, to say he's done enough, but with tears blurring her vision and the Horologium pulsing in her chest, she can't muster an argument. Just a very small ]

I'm so sorry...

[petnadjanka]

[tytree doesn't let go; even if he probably should, even if he's absolutely invading her personal space like this—and even if there were to be potential dangers to it, tytree won't let go yet.]

Stop apologizin'. I'm not looking for any of that, Cardia. [he just wants her to be okay, and for her to understand that she doesn't have to isolate herself. she doesn't have to hurt alone—thinking she should is just stupid, in his opinion.]

[discardia]

[ Just don't touch her face, it's probably fine. ]

I don't think you were looking for anything... [ She's honestly not sure how he's even here in the first place. But she doubts he was expecting to run into her or for any of this to happen. ]

[petnadjanka]

[well, that's a question he can't answer either. but what matters to him is that cardia's here, and she's hurting in some way.

enough so that she would go running off into potential danger in the dead of night. what his situation is—the hows and whys can be sorted out later.]

...I'm lookin' for you to not go doing anything stupid.

[discardia]

I'm...

[ Well. She's kind of tightly wedged against him, but she's ducking her head so if he looks down, he'll just see her hat.

... No, she doesn't have an excuse. But all the same, she still doesn't want to go back. ]

[petnadjanka]

[it's fine, because tytree is just going to stay like this for as long as cardia will let her, anyway.

he's not really sure what to say, considering he only has a vague grasp on the situation, but.

well, it's tytree. when does he ever keep his mouth shut?]

Running away... it doesn't solve anything, not ever.

[discardia]

[ But this is embarrassing-- well, it would be if Cardia was any level of calm, but so much for that. ]

... I don't think... staying where I was will solve anything, either.

[petnadjanka]

...Are you gonna know that if you just run away without trying?

[her logic just isn't connecting with him at all. he just thinks she's being stupid right now, honestly.]

[discardia]

We were only together until they investigated this clue about my father.

[ That happened. She's of no further use to them. So again, she's going to try and pull back. ]

[petnadjanka]

Yeah, so?

[tytree... still fails to see how that matters. he's a simple guy, that's for sure.]

Just because somethin' starts like that doesn't mean it stays the same.

[discardia]

[ ... it's been awhile since she's talked to someone this simple, honestly-- bar Impey. ]

It doesn't mean it changes, either. I'm grateful to them, but I don't want to put them at risk anymore.

[ And yes, it's selfish, but they've done more than enough for her. ]

[petnadjanka]

And you think running off in the middle of the night to who-knows-where is gonna take the risk away from them? Or from you? Are you even listening to yourself!?

[it's not just selfish. it's stupid and completely fucking reckless, as far as tytree is concerned.]

[discardia]

[ THERE IS ABSOLUTE SILENCE HERE. Either because Cardia doesn't actually care what happens to her right now (she doesn't) or because there's really no point in arguing, whether or not Tytree happens to be yelling pretty damn loudly.

That she isn't arguing probably implies that she doesn't think he's entirely wrong, even if implications and Tytree might not always go well together. ]

[petnadjanka]

[it's definitely not entirely easy for tytree to parse all of those sentiments, but it's pretty clear that even if she's saying nothing—and even if he's not in return, he's waiting for some kind of response.

preferably one that shows that maybe some of his words are getting through to her. it's frustrating for him to see her like this, especially considering he really doesn't care about any of the things she seems to think make her less valuable as a person or something like that.]

[discardia]

[ Tytree, you probably ought to be more concerned with the fact that your friend is one big lethal test tube baby, but--

After that long silence, her shoulders slump. ]

I'll... apologize to them properly.

[ Even though she really doesn't want to go back. ]

[petnadjanka]

[yeah. he's not really all too concerned with that aspect of things at all. instead, his shoulders are just going to slump as the tension drains from him. tytree's willing to take a step back and give her a little bit of breathing room, but they're not really out of the woods yet.

literally or figuratively.]

That's more like it. I bet you'll see that they'll feel better about all of it too, ya know?